When I'm dead .........

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Mick F
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When I'm dead .........

Postby Mick F » 17 Dec 2018, 4:34pm

I have no intention (or expectation) of dying.
Let's get this bit out of the way first! :D

Years ago, I imagined a big funeral and a carriage pulled by four plumed horses with me lying in state inside. I imagined a Victorian sort of affair with mourners in abundance and a big wake afterwards. I've since had a change of heart.

A friend of ours has bought a plot at the local parish church and wants a big funeral and be laid to rest in his chosen position. I've told him that after he's gone, I'll sell the plot, drink the profits, and chuck his body in the river. :lol: :lol:

When I'm dead, do not spend a penny on getting rid of what's left of me. I'll be dead and I couldn't care a jot what you do with my body. Do not spend a penny. Incinerate me in a garden incinerator and chuck the ash out with the regular rubbish collection.

If you do want to spend something, chuck behind the bar and drink my health/death.
Mick F. Cornwall

mercalia
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby mercalia » 17 Dec 2018, 4:39pm

Mick F wrote:I have no intention (or expectation) of dying.
Let's get this bit out of the way first! :D

Years ago, I imagined a big funeral and a carriage pulled by four plumed horses with me lying in state inside. I imagined a Victorian sort of affair with mourners in abundance and a big wake afterwards. I've since had a change of heart.

A friend of ours has bought a plot at the local parish church and wants a big funeral and be laid to rest in his chosen position. I've told him that after he's gone, I'll sell the plot, drink the profits, and chuck his body in the river. :lol: :lol:

When I'm dead, do not spend a penny on getting rid of what's left of me. I'll be dead and I couldn't care a jot what you do with my body. Do not spend a penny. Incinerate me in a garden incinerator and chuck the ash out with the regular rubbish collection.

If you do want to spend something, chuck behind the bar and drink my health/death.


I agree. Lining the funeral directors pocket ( it seems there was a recent report how they exploit the event to extract as much cash as possible ) is not some thing I would want to do. Though in your friends case he could hire a whole lot of actors as mourners ( 100's of them ) to make it all a bit of a spectacle for the news papers. "how long did you know the deceased? hmm I am just a rent-a-mourner, hmm I am just here for the beer"
Last edited by mercalia on 17 Dec 2018, 4:43pm, edited 2 times in total.

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NATURAL ANKLING
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby NATURAL ANKLING » 17 Dec 2018, 4:41pm

Hi,
Yeh but no but.........have you made a will.
Maybe when I die they will do an economy disposal a pick the body up with a refuse lorry and stuff you in landfill.
Not sure the actual cost of burning a body to ashes only, no point in packaging that shove it in the road works.
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby pwa » 17 Dec 2018, 4:44pm

It is possible to do a crem job with no service and no mourners. Someone can collect the ashes later and any personal aspect can be attended to at the scattering, preferably not on a windy day.

mercalia
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby mercalia » 17 Dec 2018, 4:45pm

NATURAL ANKLING wrote:Hi,
Yeh but no but.........have you made a will.
Maybe when I die they will do an economy disposal a pick the body up with a refuse lorry and stuff you in landfill.
Not sure the actual cost of burning a body to ashes only, no point in packaging that shove it in the road works.


this what you have in mind?


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Mick F
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby Mick F » 17 Dec 2018, 4:51pm

Yes, made a will.

I am married with two daughters and one grandson. Unlikely to have any more offspring.
Which ever one of the two of us dies first gets it, and when we've both gone, the two daughters get it. If all four of us cop it, the grandson gets it. If all five of us cops it all at once, I don't care who gets it.

You can't take it with you.
Mick F. Cornwall

brynpoeth
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby brynpoeth » 17 Dec 2018, 4:52pm

There are good reasons why funerals and like ceremonies are held, one likes to remember how wonderful the deceased person was, I think it could be quite a happy occasion if the dead person had had a good innings (alternative facts welcome)

Organizing funerals might be lucrative but a hard job too

Been thinking about retirement planning, financially, the problem is, I do not know the date of my death, I would like to know it, could be in a few weeks or several decades :? €€$¥?
Cycling-of course, but it is far better on a Gillott
We love safety cameras & STOP signs

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Mick F
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby Mick F » 17 Dec 2018, 4:54pm

Retirement planning is a completely different subject.

You can't take it with you, but you could live a long time .................... like I intend to do.
Mick F. Cornwall

Canuk
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby Canuk » 17 Dec 2018, 4:55pm

My old uncle wanted to be left on the top of a local mountain till the birds picked the carcass clean. Unfortunately the powers that be at the local council said 'no chance'…!

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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby landsurfer » 17 Dec 2018, 4:57pm

I'm to be cremated and my ashes put into the sea at Gwithian beach in Cornwall. By my grandson, from one of our kayaks. He did suggest a trebuchet but Jules clamped down that one. Jules would like me there so she could go swimming with me .... and vice versa if she goes first. Her sister Jennifer went in the sea there last year and we all say hello to her as we swim in the bay.
RSF.
Audax UK.
The road goes on forever.

brynpoeth
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby brynpoeth » 17 Dec 2018, 4:58pm

Might be worth seeing the film 'Four Weddings and a Funeral', I saw it but cannae remember :?
Cycling-of course, but it is far better on a Gillott
We love safety cameras & STOP signs

rjb
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby rjb » 17 Dec 2018, 5:04pm

pwa wrote:It is possible to do a crem job with no service and no mourners. Someone can collect the ashes later and any personal aspect can be attended to at the scattering, preferably not on a windy day.


This is how my dad went. No service and just the close family attended the crem. All over in 5 minutes followed by the wake.
My great grandad who died in 1927 probably had a grand affair judging by the hearse. :D

Great Grandad William Bennett Hearse 1927.jpg
At the last count:- Focus Variado, Peugeot 531 pro, Dawes Discovery Tandem, 2 Dawes Kingpins, Falcon K2 MTB dropped bar tourer, On One Pompino, Longstaff trike conversion on a Falcon corsa. :D

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ferrit worrier
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby ferrit worrier » 17 Dec 2018, 6:45pm

pwa wrote:It is possible to do a crem job with no service and no mourners. Someone can collect the ashes later and any personal aspect can be attended to at the scattering, preferably not on a windy day.


yes see simplicity cremations https://www.simplicity.co.uk/
Percussive maintainance, if it don't fit, hit it with the hammer.

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NATURAL ANKLING
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby NATURAL ANKLING » 17 Dec 2018, 6:47pm

Hi,
Mick F wrote:Yes, made a will.

I am married with two daughters and one grandson. Unlikely to have any more offspring.
Which ever one of the two of us dies first gets it, and when we've both gone, the two daughters get it. If all four of us cop it, the grandson gets it. If all five of us cops it all at once, I don't care who gets it.

You can't take it with you.

Wishes of disposal of your remains?
Priority Is Still 500K In 24..Just Dreaming...Stay Focused Guys And Keep Sharp...
You'll Find Me At The Top Of a Hill...............Somewhere

merseymouth
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Re: When I'm dead .........

Postby merseymouth » 17 Dec 2018, 6:50pm

Hi Mick, Do you think the "Soylent Green" route is available? Pick you own favourite music.
Got my music sorted - Gracie Fields singing "He's Dead But He Won't Lie Down". TTFN MM