Panic buying, hoarding

[Cugel]

Cugel, there was I trying to 'lighten the atmosphere of the forum', only to be completely trumped by the funniest thing that I've heard on here for years:

(I hope you have two and are nor half-ersed, as some of your posts may indicate)

Oh, how he chuckled.

Happy days,

Were we not to larf, about various dire matters hereabouts discussed, we would cry - a lot. For some years now, I have felt that "life is but a joke" albeit a rather black joke. And we play it on ourselves!

Somewhere in the lurgy-thread, a poster expressed suicidal thoughts because of the lurgy threat and effects. This sounded like, "I am afraid of the death dealing thing so I want to be dead". Paradoxical conundrums are everywhere so we must either chuckle at their naughtiness or go mad then run amok. In past times I have been close to the latter and only my inner wag prevented the grasping of that axe.

Cugel

[Paulatic]

Incidentally, for two sourdough loaves (rough estimates):

• 1 minute to 'feed' the starter - then leave it for about 12 hours.
• 5 minutes to make 'pre-dough' (just weighing out and mixing - it doesn't have to be kneaded). Then leave for another 8-12 hours (e.g. overnight)
• 15 minutes to make and knead dough. Then leave it to rise for 5-7 hours.
• 5 minutes to form and shape loaves. Then leave it to prove for 60-80 minutes.
• 1 minute to put in oven. Bake at 200C for 30 minutes.
• 1 minute to take out of oven.

So the total active time is just 28 minutes. The rest of the time you can be doing other things.

8am 15 mins kneading
12:00 pm yesterday’s bread for sandwiches.
2:15 pm after rising
3:20pm into oven
3:50 pm out of oven
4:30 pm probably cool enough to eat.
Agreed you can do other things between those critical times but whatever you do you’re still a slave to being in attendance.

Or
3 minutes putting ingredients in tin, push a button and go to bed.
Wake up next morning to fresh bread and the whole day to yourself.

Each to their own

[661-Pete]

you were not to know that someone has edited my post and decided that buttock is a better word to use than the word I chose, a four letter one which begins with A and ends with E.

Be reassured, it wasn't any human editor, just the (robotic) swear-word filter. And I agree - even with my limited knowledge of human anatomy - that the words are not exact synonyms.

Of course, the A-word caused an utter furore when it was first uttered in a general-release British movie - back in 1948. Very different from all the "effing" that goes on in modern films...!

[mercalia]

which is why you need a breadmaker. Panasonic are recommended. I have 2 bought on Ebay. less than 5 minutes to add the materials, come back in 4 hrs

Agreed, In The last 20+years we’ve had a Kenwood and laterally the Panasonic. The kenwood needed a replacement tin. The Panasonic has never given a bad loaf or trouble until now. Has worked out at 3 pence per loaf

how do you make that out? I think more like 20p. The cheapest bread flour Ican find is lidl at 60p for 1.5kg

[Paulatic]

which is why you need a breadmaker. Panasonic are recommended. I have 2 bought on Ebay. less than 5 minutes to add the materials, come back in 4 hrs

Agreed, In The last 20+years we’ve had a Kenwood and laterally the Panasonic. The kenwood needed a replacement tin. The Panasonic has never given a bad loaf or trouble until now. Has worked out at 3 pence per loaf

how do you make that out? I think more like 20p. The cheapest bread flour Ican find is lidl at 60p for 1.5kg

That was machine cost, depreciation, per loaf. Obviously electric on top of a500 watt oven which I’d think considerably less than a conventional oven and yes flour etc. We predominantly use wholemeal which I’ve not found in our LIDL for a couple of years now.
Just confirming to myself that it’s a lot cheaper than popping to a bakers and we’ll worth another purchase.

[Oldjohnw]

I do bread the old fashioned way. But it is really hard work.

[Bonefishblues]

I do bread the old fashioned way. But it is really hard work.

The old fashioned way involves a boy doing the hard work in my book.

[Oldjohnw]

I do bread the old fashioned way. But it is really hard work.

The old fashioned way involves a boy doing the hard work in my book.

Quite. And I'm afraid I increasingly don't have the stamina or muscle to knead properly.

[LollyKat]

Could you treat yourself to a second-hand, reconditioned Kenwood Chef? They are available on ebay. Twenty years ago I inherited my mother's one which she got around 1960 - I think she had it serviced once, and I had to get new brushes for the motor (£10), but the guy in the repair shop said it was built like a tank and had plenty of life in it. It's a bit noisy but kneading only takes 5-6 minutes while I'm doing something else. Get the stainless steel bowl, not the glass one which is really heavy.

[Oldjohnw]

Could you treat yourself to a second-hand, reconditioned Kenwood Chef? They are available on ebay. Twenty years ago I inherited my mother's one which she got around 1960 - I think she had it serviced once, and I had to get new brushes for the motor (£10), but the guy in the repair shop said it was built like a tank and had plenty of life in it. It's a bit noisy but kneading only takes 5-6 minutes while I'm doing something else. Get the stainless steel bowl, not the glass one which is really heavy.

I imagine that's exactly what I will do. And thanks.

[Paulatic]

Could you treat yourself to a second-hand, reconditioned Kenwood Chef? They are available on ebay. Twenty years ago I inherited my mother's one which she got around 1960 - I think she had it serviced once, and I had to get new brushes for the motor (£10), but the guy in the repair shop said it was built like a tank and had plenty of life in it. It's a bit noisy but kneading only takes 5-6 minutes while I'm doing something else. Get the stainless steel bowl, not the glass one which is really heavy.

I looked on EBay yesterday if you’ve got one to sell then now is the time.

[NATURAL ANKLING]

Hi,

Reflecting on hoarding and some of the posts, had somebody looked in my cupboards 4 weeks ago they'd probably class me as a hoarder. I had e.g. many tins of coffee because when I visit the supermarket if my coffee if on offer at £3 for what is normally £5-50 then I'll buy 5 tins. Then none for ages until the next offer, etc. Same with other products with a long life e.g. mayonnaise (which I use a fair amount of), UHT (which I buy a box of 12 litre packs once every few months).

I tend to visit the supermarket maybe once a week and stock-up for that week. So look in my cupboards day after a shop and I'd be a hoarder but look day before a supermarket shop and I would not be a hoarder.

Even on supermarket shop days I tend to use a hand basket (even though it can sometimes be a struggle to carry and keep everything in it).

But I suspect that hoarders would be easier to spot as I doubt anybody would normally have 2 or more x 9-pack of toilet paper in their trolley or 2 or more 10 litre packs of UHT milk. That said it is a suspicion as I seem to have missed seeing the hoarders - people can't fill their trolley with toilet paper when there is no toilet paper left on the shelves.

Ian

That's about me to a T really, Ok so I am guilty of buying two packs of UHT that's 12×2 L at a time, that way I don't have to buy any next week ha ha.
And if I miss a week because I can't be bothered or I don't wanna go out or Lidl is closed yet again which it does, Citing the managers gone home early Because the thermometer is dropped to 5° C or their re-fitting for the 10th time, I can probably survive most of next week.
What's not to like.

[NATURAL ANKLING]

Hi,

I gave up on my breadmaker when the bread pan lost its non stick quality and one had to dig the bread out of the tin. I know make mine in the oven. Easy peasy.

Back in the eighties I used to make once proven wholemeal aka Cranks thought it was great but don’t think I would now. 30 yrs of bread maker has made me lazy bung it in go to bed and bread in the morning.
Where am I going to find the time for planning and kneading I’m not isolated away from work there’s no days off when you’re retired!

On old breadmaker pan, if you can't get a replacement then you can just do what I do, a bit of cooking oil smeared around the pan.
If it sticks when you try to shake it out just ease it with a plastic spatula down the sides.
The Lidls breadmaker pan is a bit cheap and nasty although II have brought replacements in the past, Panasonic is better but they are more expensive but you can buy the parts.

[661-Pete]

Could you treat yourself to a second-hand, reconditioned Kenwood Chef? They are available on ebay. Twenty years ago I inherited my mother's one which she got around 1960 - I think she had it serviced once, and I had to get new brushes for the motor (£10), but the guy in the repair shop said it was built like a tank and had plenty of life in it. It's a bit noisy but kneading only takes 5-6 minutes while I'm doing something else. Get the stainless steel bowl, not the glass one which is really heavy.

I looked on EBay yesterday if you’ve got one to sell then now is the time.

I've just spotted these posts.

I've just remembered, I believe I have two Kenwood Chefs sitting idle in the loft, unused. One of them was given us as a wedding present but we hardly ever used it and now have no space for it in the kitchen. The other was my mother's, it dates from the 1960s but it may still be in working order.

Give me a little while to see if I can find either of them and then check them out. If they're working, I'm prepared to give them out FOC to first comers, provided you collect (I'm in Mid Sussex area). Send me a PM if interested. I'll be happy to get rid of them.

[NATURAL ANKLING]

Hi,

Incidentally, for two sourdough loaves (rough estimates):

• 1 minute to 'feed' the starter - then leave it for about 12 hours.
• 5 minutes to make 'pre-dough' (just weighing out and mixing - it doesn't have to be kneaded). Then leave for another 8-12 hours (e.g. overnight)
• 15 minutes to make and knead dough. Then leave it to rise for 5-7 hours.
• 5 minutes to form and shape loaves. Then leave it to prove for 60-80 minutes.
• 1 minute to put in oven. Bake at 200C for 30 minutes.
• 1 minute to take out of oven.

So the total active time is just 28 minutes. The rest of the time you can be doing other things.

8am 15 mins kneading
12:00 pm yesterday’s bread for sandwiches.
2:15 pm after rising
3:20pm into oven
3:50 pm out of oven
4:30 pm probably cool enough to eat.
Agreed you can do other things between those critical times but whatever you do you’re still a slave to being in attendance.

Or
3 minutes putting ingredients in tin, push a button and go to bed.
Wake up next morning to fresh bread and the whole day to yourself.

Each to their own

I've tried fluid in the bottom and fluid on top of flour, what's your method?
I'm still trying to work out Pete's recipe have to give it a try one day, what's the rising agent again?