Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

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Cyril Haearn
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Cyril Haearn »

Audax67 wrote:
cycleruk wrote:For those of you who don't want Alexa listening in on your conversations.
They are now making a male version - it doesn't listen to anything. :roll: :wink:


Whereas the female version chimes in the first time you draw breath and talks for five minutes about something else.

Oh dear, is this sexist?

Nein es ist umgekehrt, no it is the other way round, look at how males on these fora engage in thread drift :wink:
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Cowsham
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Cowsham »

What's black an white and eats like a horse?
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Mike Sales
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Mike Sales »

Cowsham wrote:What's black an white and eats like a horse?


expecting a QI klaxon...a zebra?
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pete75
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by pete75 »

Cowsham wrote:What's black an white and eats like a horse?


Simple - a black and white horse.

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Cowsham
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Cowsham »

Mike Sales wrote:
Cowsham wrote:What's black an white and eats like a horse?


expecting a QI klaxon...a zebra?


Correct !
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Cowsham
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Cowsham »

pete75 wrote:
Cowsham wrote:What's black an white and eats like a horse?


Simple - a black and white horse.

Image


https://images.app.goo.gl/Vcu4TLKtFj1pNhrQ6
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RickH
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by RickH »

What is the commonest type of owl?









A teet owl!
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cycleruk
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by cycleruk »

I went down to the local library and when I got there I noticed a large notice outside that said “health week”.
It said that to start the New Year off they were having a health week and that they would be selling vegetables.
Well, I thought that’s a turnip for the books isn’t it.
You'll never know if you don't try it.
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pete75
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by pete75 »

29062782_1033418023474727_4751327177725706240_n.jpg
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Spinners
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Spinners »

RickH wrote:What is the commonest type of owl?









A teet owl!


Love it!
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Cyril Haearn
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Cyril Haearn »

'Late for school again, lad!', barked the teacher
'Sorry, I was accosted by a thief, he did not take much, just my homework', bleated Cyril :?
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mercalia
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by mercalia »

Ricky Gervais socks it to HollyWood at the golden globes

‘If you do win an award tonight, don’t use it as a platform to make a political speech. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg. If you win, thank your agent, thank your god, and [rude word removed] off.’

https://blogs.spectator.co.uk/2020/01/ricky-gervais-has-given-hollywood-the-thrashing-it-richly-deserves/
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661-Pete
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by 661-Pete »

pete75 wrote:29062782_1033418023474727_4751327177725706240_n.jpg
Excellent. Hope non-French speakers aren't too frustrated. "Je m'en fous" means "I don't give a ****"
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mercalia
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by mercalia »

661-Pete wrote:
pete75 wrote:29062782_1033418023474727_4751327177725706240_n.jpg
Excellent. Hope non-French speakers aren't too frustrated. "Je m'en fous" means "I don't give a ****"


seems like the rude word software not multi lingual? :lol:
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Tinpotflowers
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Post by Tinpotflowers »

Advert in newspaper.

Encyclopaedia Britannica for sale
Hardly used
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