Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

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Cowsham
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Cowsham » 29 Nov 2020, 11:49pm

mercalia wrote:Capture.JPG


Can't help thinking that caption is not all that apt.
Should be " we're here to shout to you about how bad the world is "

kwackers
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Joined: 4 Jun 2008, 9:29pm
Location: Warrington

Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby kwackers » 1 Dec 2020, 4:35pm

deerjesus.jpg

Debs
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Location: Powys

Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Debs » 1 Dec 2020, 6:46pm

Guess who i bumped into today at Specsavers?

Everyone!

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Mick F
Spambuster
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Location: Tamar Valley, Cornwall

Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Mick F » 1 Dec 2020, 6:48pm

I doubt you did.
One person out, one person in now. :wink:
Mick F. Cornwall

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kylecycler
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Location: Kyle, Ayrshire

Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby kylecycler » 2 Dec 2020, 1:18pm

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they're good at it.

Cyril Haearn
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Cyril Haearn » 2 Dec 2020, 1:28pm

Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?
..
Because her head is so far from her shoulders, it wouldnae reach else :wink:
Entertainer, juvenile, curmudgeon, PoB, 30120
Cycling-of course, but it is far better on a Gillott
We love safety cameras, we hate bullies

sjs
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby sjs » 2 Dec 2020, 1:29pm

I hear that Tesco are giving free turkeys this year to anyone who can run faster than their security people.

mercalia
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby mercalia » 2 Dec 2020, 2:20pm

Capture.JPG
Yippee!


I had a look at their prices. No wonder they are bankrupt.

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cycleruk
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Location: Lancashire

Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby cycleruk » 2 Dec 2020, 7:04pm

mercalia wrote:Capture.JPG

I had a look at their prices. No wonder they are bankrupt.

Latest news is they are selling everything with 70% off. Pity they don't sell anything I want or need. :(
You'll never know if you don't try it.

mercalia
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby mercalia » 2 Dec 2020, 7:46pm

cycleruk wrote:
mercalia wrote:Capture.JPG

I had a look at their prices. No wonder they are bankrupt.

Latest news is they are selling everything with 70% off. Pity they don't sell anything I want or need. :(


well some things I saw were 50% off many were just like £80 -> £60. As you there is nothing there I want either. It will be strange place with many of the stores closed down. No great loss except for the employees

Debs
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Location: Powys

Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Debs » 2 Dec 2020, 8:15pm

I bought my friend an elephant for his room.

He said “thanks”.

I said, “don’t mention it”.

kwackers
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby kwackers » 2 Dec 2020, 8:19pm

tiers.png

Oldjohnw
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Oldjohnw » 4 Dec 2020, 5:42pm

My wife and I were walking through town and passed a swanky new restaurant.

She said, "What a delicious smell coming from there".

Being a generous sort of guy I decided to treat her.







So we turned round and walked past it again.
John

kwackers
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby kwackers » 6 Dec 2020, 6:46pm

tracking.jpg

Debs
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Re: Funniest clean joke I've heard recently

Postby Debs » 7 Dec 2020, 7:50pm

Image