Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Bonefishblues
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by Bonefishblues »

I think the point @Cowsham is that each person suffering from this condition has to find his or her own personal motivation to fight and beat (or better put, control) it. Sharing others suffering isn't the way to do this.

OP, sounds like you've begun the journey, I wish you every success.
bikepacker
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by bikepacker »

I hope you are successful in your wish to be teetotal it is not an easy journey. Be prepared for a few tough years and understand the urge to drink will probably never totally leave you. I gave up on the 18th Feb 1990 and if I get a scent of malt whisky the urge to have one still comes back.

As I much of my time was taken up with other things, sparring the time to go to AA was not an option. Following advice from a friend who had been there, I decided to go cold turkey. The first 3 months were the hardest and but I was determined to get clean. That determination is I believe the most important factor in becoming teetotal.

31 years and 3 days without any alcoholic drink, if I can do it so can you. Best of luck.
There is your way. There is my way. But there is no "the way".
millimole
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by millimole »

The message I feel is important from @cowsham's (and others) post is that addiction affects not only the individual, but a wide circle of others around them, and sometimes far beyond.
The addict may kid themselves it's only their own life they are destroying, but it's spouses, children, friends, workmates, - the list goes on.
My sister had her life made a misery due to a marriage to an alcoholic, and I know that our childhoods would have been very different if our father hadn't been a gambler.
(I don't drink out of choice, and won't gamble even on the lottery)
Beating addiction is hard, but there is help out there for those who seek it.
Leicester; Riding my Hetchins since 1971; Day rides on my Dawes; Going to the shops on a Decathlon Hoprider
pwa
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by pwa »

When I recognised I was drinking too much and too often I knew that with my lack of self control the only way to improve matters was to give it up completely. I knew that if I tried to just cut down I would slip back. So I gave up completely, for about 18 months. And it acted as a re-set, so that when I went back to having the odd glass of wine it stayed at just that, the odd glass.

But everyone is different and it might not work for you.

Good luck with it.
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Ride-sleep-repeat
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by Ride-sleep-repeat »

I had my last alcoholic drink Xmas eve 2019.I wasn't an alcoholic but did drink heavily almost everyday.Waking up in a Police cell Xmas day with no memory of the previous day and the results of that made my mind up.I didn't go to AA but started to see a Councillor one-to-one.It helped me no end.Unfortunately face to face meetings were stopped due to Covid but we still kept in touch via text/phone/email.I originally said I was giving booze a rest for 6 months.I text Linda(my Councillor) Xmas day 2020 to let her know I'd actually done a full year!
Talking to someone completely out of your social circle who is trained to deal with Alcoholism would be a huge benefit.

Good luck!
esuhl
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by esuhl »

Have you heard of SMART Recovery? Apparently it's just like AA, but without the religion/spirituality, and more grounded in psychology.

https://smartrecovery.org.uk/
djnotts
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by djnotts »

I am an alcoholic. I have had nil alcohol, not in food, chocolate, none for 17 years, 10 months and 5 days. (These 2 statements are not contradictory, despite what even some doctors have said to me .... "just one drink won't hurt after so long" .... )
I also was fully functioning for many years, but early retirement from ft work and soon got totally out of any control.
You have made the prerequisite first step, admitting it to yourself. AA is not for all - I went to a few meetings but the underlying quasi religious bit not for me.
I tried sudden stop without detox drugs: not a good idea, nearly killed me as well as being briefly sectioned.
Controlled drinking also failed.
Finally I convinced my GP to prescribe same massive drug package as used in detox wards. I laid out the 5-7 day dosages and locked myself in house. Hell.
Regularly attended Alcohol and Drug Advisory Service for about a year, but have remained totally dry since.
Do I still want a drink? Yes. But not with quite the same intensity as first 10 years. I no longer dream about pubs and bars and drinking every night.
There are still dangerous possible triggers - my wife died nearly 3 years ago and while first few days bearable sober, having registered her death I actually found myself turning into a pub doorway... I did not enter.
If an addictive personality (about which I am not entirely convinced), need a substitute. Main was and continues to be daily (as far as possible) cycling.
All I can offer is it is damn hard, but achievable.
And when folk try to get you to drink, come straight out with "no, I am an alcoholic."
Good luck.
PS PM me if you want.
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elPedro666
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by elPedro666 »

As everyone has said, fair play on making the first move and respect for what can't have been an easy thing to share.

All I wanted to add was something positive I've been noticing for a while now, and that's the increasing number of people who - for whatever reason - are choosing not to drink, particularly in situations where in the past it would've been de-rigueur. I'm loosely involved with Primordial Radio and a lot of our gigs/events are pretty boozy affairs, but more and more people are asking about attending sober, and more and more people are responding.

What I'm trying to say, is the idea that you're the only sober person at the party is rapidly becoming outdated.

All the best with your new future!

I'm a trendy consumer. Just look at my CLT-L09 using hovercraft full of eels.
yostumpy
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by yostumpy »

Old thread revival time. @ Rob87 , how did you get on, have you won your battle?
Last edited by yostumpy on 23 Jan 2022, 12:23pm, edited 2 times in total.
Jdsk
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by Jdsk »

elPedro666 wrote: 3 Mar 2021, 1:10pmAll I wanted to add was something positive I've been noticing for a while now, and that's the increasing number of people who - for whatever reason - are choosing not to drink, particularly in situations where in the past it would've been de-rigueur. I'm loosely involved with Primordial Radio and a lot of our gigs/events are pretty boozy affairs, but more and more people are asking about attending sober, and more and more people are responding.

What I'm trying to say, is the idea that you're the only sober person at the party is rapidly becoming outdated.
Agreed.

Jonathan
briansnail
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Joined: 1 Sep 2019, 3:07pm

Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by briansnail »

Tough one. Lots of people innocently got fatally hooked on initially innocent opioids. Any addiction is easy. There is a food brain connection. The bacteria in the gut dictate what we eat and drink. It is a second brain. Its is an override system. Substitute for other vices. If you want a drink go for a nice Indian curry which is less harmful and addictive. The key is activity. Idleness is the devils friend. Make new friends who do not drink to help break the cycle. Take long fast walks when temptation beckons as it will.
However realise life it is not easy and it will be difficult. Obviously you need to keep your house a alcohol free zone totally. We all wish you the best. God (or the force if your atheist) be with you.

You might consider keeping a "memento memori" on your wall. Mine is a picture of a skull. Before you back away and say this guy is just to weird "Moderator we have a nut in our cycling fraternity - Help". I should explain some Jesuits use it as a daily reminder. Life is on a timer and we need to to live it well. With no regrets. Its best to be good. I am sorry if this post is a little unconventional .I am just guessing your a grown intelligent man. You do NOT want the usual platitudes and spin. I am guessing work takes all your time. Your problem is really you have no time to research what you want to do or love in life. Alcohol is your solace. It fills an empty space. A big help is to identify a hobby your passionate about. Try keyboard, take lessons turn that sound up and fill the street. Astronomy clubs are good. Weekend CTC and charity cycle rides are your best initial bet. However if you try and pass me. Just be aware I carry tacks in my pocket to slow down faster riders.

Your first exercise is to get Lance Armstrong's. "Its not about the bike". Its old now but will divert your mind. It shows humans as as frail and at their weakest. You will be inspired.

Weekends will be difficult as there is less to occupy. Get your bike and visit DIFFERENT ONES on a Sunday. Go to the same one you will bored and give up in a month. You will feel so good when people all roll up in cars and you have your bike. Filling in time will give you purpose. I just hope you do not find that I am giving you stupid advice and driving you to drink. Always visit this site for update and advise you have 10k CTC Members plus routing for you!
50sbiker
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Joined: 18 Aug 2019, 11:11am

Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by 50sbiker »

jezer wrote: 19 Feb 2021, 6:18pm I recommend giving AA another try. It can appear initially as a religious organisation, and it is common for new attendees to be put off by this. If you can see past that for a few meetings the twelve step program does work if you can follow it with an open mind. I assume there are no physical meetings as the moment, but I’m sure there are online ones. Having a sponsor within the fellowship is also very important. I have found that the AA system does work for many people, although not all of course. One thing is certain, and that is without such help the risk of relapse is very high. To give yourself the best chance of success you need to accept the program and follow it, but dial out any hint of religion. I wish you good luck.
I would say realising you have a problem is by far the biggest step in helping yourself.. If it was me, 100% abstinance would be my greatest hope. Do not expect immediate results..When you fail, not If, keep on trying...Talk to your friends, family,it puts a positive pressure on you to keep trying.Do something instead, whatever makes you happy..Keep your mind busy.set goals.targets.milestones.Reward yourself.Persevere...For you..For those who Love you.
50sbiker
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by 50sbiker »

Rob87 wrote: 19 Feb 2021, 5:11pm Afternoon all.
I'm posting this on this forum as I don't know any of you which likewise means I'm unonown to you guys. secondly, I love cycling and it has become a huge part of life.

It has occured to me, after yet another health damaging drink last night, that I am indeed an alcoholic. I was raised in pubs and followed suit of drinking 95% of my days. My usual drink in the house would be 4 strong beers and usually spirits ontop. When I'm out (when we could) then as many as possible.
I am functioning, employed with family and what not so an adiction isn't great. There is no off switch once I have a sip and I even male sure the beer is strong abv to get me intoxicated. These arent normal behaviours.
I tried Alcoholics Anonnymous ten years ago but it's religion based (not my cup of tea).

My lass knows I have a problem but when I try to stop she enabpes me somehow at a party or a meal etc. I'm gonna say it needs to stop tonight but I've said it before so don't know what reaction to expect.

So, Has anyone ever gone (going) through alcoholism? whay mechanisms do you use to cope when you get the urge? Has your life improved since sobering up and how? did you tell people.of your problem or just stop and keep it to yourself?

I suppose I'm posting on here because while looking at youtube videos and reading on it is helpful, it's a very lonely and isolated method of self help.

Well, thanks for reading and all the best. Ride Safe.
I would say realising you have a problem is by far the biggest step in helping yourself.. If it was me, 100% abstinance would be my greatest hope. Do not expect immediate results..When you fail, not If, keep on trying...Talk to your friends, family,it puts a positive pressure on you to keep trying.Do something instead, whatever makes you happy..Keep your mind busy.set goals.targets.milestones.Reward yourself.Persevere...For you..For those who Love you
Jdsk
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Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by Jdsk »

50sbiker wrote: 2 Mar 2022, 10:14amI would say realising you have a problem is by far the biggest step in helping yourself.. If it was me, 100% abstinance would be my greatest hope. Do not expect immediate results..When you fail, not If, keep on trying...Talk to your friends, family,it puts a positive pressure on you to keep trying.Do something instead, whatever makes you happy..Keep your mind busy.set goals.targets.milestones.Reward yourself.Persevere...For you..For those who Love you
Yes

Jonathan
Jdsk
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Joined: 5 Mar 2019, 5:42pm

Re: Alcoholism and dealing with it.

Post by Jdsk »

Recent systematic review of programs:

"Alcoholics Anonymous and other 12‐step programs for alcohol use disorder":
https://www.cochranelibrary.com/cdsr/do ... .pub2/full
includes a plain language summary.

Associated news piece:
https://www.cochrane.org/news/new-cochr ... elp-people

Jonathan
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