Coronavirus limericks

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661-Pete
Posts: 10593
Joined: 22 Nov 2012, 8:45pm
Location: Sussex

Coronavirus limericks

Post by 661-Pete »

This idea we discussed over dinner. Call it 'gallows humour' if you like. Here's my effort:
We're stuck with this nasty disease,
Which makes quite a lot of us wheeze,
They've come up with some new laws,
That make us stay indoors,
And no-one's permitted to sneeze....

I'm sure you can do better.
Suppose that this room is a lift. The support breaks and down we go with ever-increasing velocity.
Let us pass the time by performing physical experiments...
--- Arthur Eddington (creator of the Eddington Number).
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Mick F
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Posts: 56359
Joined: 7 Jan 2007, 11:24am
Location: Tamar Valley, Cornwall

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by Mick F »

We’re stuck with this nasty disease
And it’s cured with fresh cottage cheese
The problem I’ve found
Is that it costs more than a pound
Of some terribly dense processed peas.
Mick F. Cornwall
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Paulatic
Posts: 7804
Joined: 2 Feb 2014, 1:03pm
Location: 24 Hours from Lands End

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by Paulatic »

It Travelled through many lands
While knackering all my plans
Stuck at home
Using my phone
and constantly washing my hands.
Whatever I am, wherever I am, this is me. This is my life

https://stcleve.wordpress.com/category/lejog/
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peetee
Posts: 4292
Joined: 4 May 2010, 10:20pm
Location: Upon a lumpy, scarred granite massif.

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by peetee »

The Covid disease is upon us
If we don’t stay alone we are gonners
So we sit by this forum
And members we bore ‘em
With bike tips, tales and past honours
The older I get the more I’m inclined to act my shoe size, not my age.
Oldjohnw
Posts: 7764
Joined: 16 Oct 2018, 4:23am
Location: South Warwickshire

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by Oldjohnw »

There was an old man from Tyneside
Who got this disease right inside.
He coughed and he spluttered
And wheezed and then stuttered

"I've had quite enough of this Bugger".
John
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Paulatic
Posts: 7804
Joined: 2 Feb 2014, 1:03pm
Location: 24 Hours from Lands End

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by Paulatic »

Not exactly a limerick but a cracking wee poem done in the style of Rabbie.
D1A029CD-79ED-4842-8D7C-5EC53AA3D873.jpeg
Whatever I am, wherever I am, this is me. This is my life

https://stcleve.wordpress.com/category/lejog/
E2E info
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Audax67
Posts: 6001
Joined: 25 Aug 2011, 9:02am
Location: Alsace, France
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Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by Audax67 »

Over there, as foretold, it did pass
That a pestilence Trumped them, alas.
Pray that Don of that name
May soon catch the same
For he Covided everyone's ass.*

* see 10th commandment
Have we got time for another cuppa?
lbomaak2
Posts: 107
Joined: 3 Aug 2009, 12:38pm
Location: Loughborough

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by lbomaak2 »

There was once a virus from China
That spread all around a cruise liner
People started to cough
And they couldn't get off
But at least there was food in the diner
prestavalve
Posts: 126
Joined: 24 Dec 2020, 8:03pm

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by prestavalve »

There once was a Scottish First Minister,
Who did have a plan most sinister.
She'd play the part of a hero,
To get the "No" vote to zero,
Through a crisis she'd intentionally maladminister.

The excess death rate in Scotland for the last reported week was 1% (that's 10 people).

https://www.nrscotland.gov.uk/statistic ... n-scotland
Jdsk
Posts: 24640
Joined: 5 Mar 2019, 5:42pm

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by Jdsk »

It doesn't take that much extra effort to make them scan... even if only in a limited and specific way...

Jonathan
prestavalve
Posts: 126
Joined: 24 Dec 2020, 8:03pm

Re: Coronavirus limericks

Post by prestavalve »

Jdsk wrote:It doesn't take that much extra effort to make them scan... even if only in a limited and specific way...


There was a pretty woman from Nantucket,
Who had something the size of a bucket.
But we'll never know what,
Because the wrong number of syllables appears in this line and that's what's important about a limerick.
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