Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Commuting, Day rides, Audax, Incidents, etc.
TallestTim
Posts: 14
Joined: 20 Jun 2018, 12:39pm

Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by TallestTim »

Good Afternoon all

After a shockingly close pass of about 10 to 20 cm at 30 + mph to get to the back of the queue ahead (during which i think the driver was laughing at me, they certainly were when i asked for more space 20 seconds later as they sat in the queue), which caused me to break down afterwards, and then again 15 minutes later while reporting them for assault at the police station, on top of all the other incidents this week (and being knocked off 3 weeks ago) I've realised that riding to and from work, after doing it for 5 years is just too damn stressful and scary - it's effecting my sleep, my home life, my work. I've tried numerous different routes, numerous different times of day, but I've had incidents on all the viable routes, including over the years, numerous incidents from the same driver.

My family have asked me to stop riding as they'd rather have me home each day, rather than worrying where I am, if i'm alive, if i'm going to make it home to read the bedtime story, and while I've been battling the decision as i don't own my own car, I can't continue doing it to myself, or my family any more, so am looking to buy a car and drive; but the moment the decision was made, it felt like a massive weight was transferred from my shoulders.

The full incident is on camera, and i'm going to kick my wife out of the kitchen tonight so that she won't see the footage as I will watch it to submit writing the witness statement to the police, and it's going to eat me up inside doing so; I'll probably not sleep well tonight because of it. And yes, i have to report it, otherwise I couldn't live with myself if the driver goes on to assault others.

I'm also concerned further by the financial impact that buying and running a car will add to my stress as it wasn't something i'd planned to do at all (in fact i took this job & salary because I could sell my car and ride to work) , but i'm being forced into it by this driver's behaviour (accepting it's the tipping point of a long journey), alongside the need to find time now to drive to work (which will probably take longer most days) and then find additional time to get my exercise.... and no, Bus/PT or walking isn't an option, as it would take way too long each day - the ride is 45 minutes, Bus/Walk is 1 1/2 hours each way)

What, and how can i progress from this back to riding to work? in the last 2 years i've Bikeabilty Level 3, but I'm sure a refresher wouldn't hurt; however, i recognise the problem here isn't me, it's them....

Any help or guidance would be really, really appreciated.

(Edit - and yes, already campaigning very loudly at multiple levels for safe cycle routes)
Ta

Tim
Vorpal
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Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Vorpal »

I'm sorry to hear about your experiences. You obviously have to do what is best for you, but some things to think about & alternative tor try...

1) advocate for better infrastructure; segregated routes, filtered traffic, and other improvements that make for better cycling environments are being implemented all over the UK. Find out who is working on it in your area (Cycling UK should have some information about their representatives). This is obviously a long term, rather than short term solution. (edit: I see you've added this :) )
2) edit: Cyclecraft, by John Franklin and published by TSO (more info than Bikeability)
3) can you work flexible hours? Or do your cycle commute at different times to avoid the worst traffic? even 10 minutes one way or the other might be enough if you are being targetted by a particular person
4) Before you give up & buy a car, hire one for a bit & see if you can cope with the driving. Personally, I go stir crazy after a couple of weeks of driving to work, and my perspective on this has changed over the years.
5) What will you do for exercise instead of cycling? Is it something you can commit the time to, in addition to driving? Or do you get enough exercise without cycling? Otherwise, the risk from illness that results from being sedentary is likely higher, and possible much higher than the risk of traffic injury.
6) can you get a lift with a colleague for a while, and limit cycling to off-road and quiet lane rides until you are ready to try your commute again?
7) Can you use public transport? Or combine cycling & public transport to leave out the worst bits of your commute?

good luck!
“In some ways, it is easier to be a dissident, for then one is without responsibility.”
― Nelson Mandela, Long Walk to Freedom
TallestTim
Posts: 14
Joined: 20 Jun 2018, 12:39pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by TallestTim »

Vorpal wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 2:51pm I'm sorry to hear about your experiences. You obviously have to do what is best for you, but some things to think about & alternative tor try...

1) advocate for better infrastructure; segregated routes, filtered traffic, and other improvements that make for better cycling environments are being implemented all over the UK. Find out who is working on it in your area (Cycling UK should have some information about their representatives). This is obviously a long term, rather than short term solution. (edit: I see you've added this :) )
2) edit: Cyclecraft, by John Franklin and published by TSO (more info than Bikeability)
3) can you work flexible hours? Or do your cycle commute at different times to avoid the worst traffic? even 10 minutes one way or the other might be enough if you are being targetted by a particular person
4) Before you give up & buy a car, hire one for a bit & see if you can cope with the driving. Personally, I go stir crazy after a couple of weeks of driving to work, and my perspective on this has changed over the years.
5) What will you do for exercise instead of cycling? Is it something you can commit the time to, in addition to driving? Or do you get enough exercise without cycling? Otherwise, the risk from illness that results from being sedentary is likely higher, and possible much higher than the risk of traffic injury.
6) can you get a lift with a colleague for a while, and limit cycling to off-road and quiet lane rides until you are ready to try your commute again?
7) Can you use public transport? Or combine cycling & public transport to leave out the worst bits of your commute?

good luck!
Thanks Vorpal, most appreciated.
1) Yes - I'm a committee member for a couple of local cycle campaign groups.
2) Got Cyclecraft, read it before I did the bikeability course, but another reminder to re-read, thank you.
3) Tried varing the time of day, +/- an hour, but it's either everyone speeding when quiet, or angry and squeezing past to get to the back of the queue ahead.
4) I know i'll be able to do the drive - i do still drive using a hire car occasionally when needing to carry "big" stuff. A long term hire isn't as expensive as I thought it would be though for 3 months, so will look into that.
5) Probably buy a smart trainer and put the bike on that, as well as walk the dog for longer, but i'm really concerned about the lack of exercise most of all by this.
6) Not really, variability of hours & CV19 making most WFH means not a viable option.
7) Nope, PT desert.

Ta
Vorpal
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Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Vorpal »

TallestTim wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 3:40pm
3) Tried varing the time of day, +/- an hour, but it's either everyone speeding when quiet, or angry and squeezing past to get to the back of the queue ahead.
My thought about varying the time of day, included missing the person(s) targetting you. So, 10 or 20 minutes earlier might not make so big a difference to traffic conditions, but it might to missing the #¤%&* making you life especially miserable.
TallestTim wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 3:40pm 4) I know i'll be able to do the drive - i do still drive using a hire car occasionally when needing to carry "big" stuff. A long term hire isn't as expensive as I thought it would be though for 3 months, so will look into that.
When I had to do my commute driving every day for a couple of months due to an injury, I got really fed up with it after a couple of weeks. I didn't used to mind it. I commuted up to 30 miles each way for years, and was fine with it, but after some years of either cycling every day, or at least several days a week, I found that I wasn't very happy with driving every day.

My stress levels & capability to handle work pressures seem to be inversely proportional to my weekly cycling distance.

A little story to illustrate.... (don't bother with this if it is too much) I either broke a rib or tore connecting tissue between them, 6 or 7 years ago. The GP didn't recommend x-rays. He said the cure was the same either way. Just gave me a prescription for pain medication & wrote me off work for a few days. So when I went back, I was in some pain, and not up to full capacity. After a couple of weeks, though, I was able to work more or less normally, but not take any exercise other than gentle walks.

After about a month of this, I was feeling stressed and irritable at work all the time. I initially chalked it up to a combination of work demands and still being in some pain. A couple of weeks later, I had a go on a spinning bike, and felt somewhat better, even if my injury meant I couldn't do very much. I gradually increased what I did on the spinning bike, and my stress levels gradually decreased. They completely returned to normal when I was able to resume my cycle commute. I guess if I had enough turbo time, leisure rides, and walks, I could achieve the same thing, but of course that is all time in addition to my commute, so that would be some hours per week fewer to do other things.
TallestTim wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 3:40pm
6) Not really, variability of hours & CV19 making most WFH means not a viable option.
Can you WFH? Do a bike ride at other times and places as it suits you, rather than commuting? This is obviously a short term solution under the best of circumstances, but it's what I am doing at the moment.
“In some ways, it is easier to be a dissident, for then one is without responsibility.”
― Nelson Mandela, Long Walk to Freedom
pete75
Posts: 16370
Joined: 24 Jul 2007, 2:37pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by pete75 »

Your first post is the most depressing story I've read on this forum. The driver needs taking off the roads for a goodly period so what are the police actually doing?
'Give me my bike, a bit of sunshine - and a stop-off for a lunchtime pint - and I'm a happy man.' - Reg Baker
Stradageek
Posts: 1657
Joined: 17 Jan 2011, 1:07pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Stradageek »

Many condolences, sounds horrible. I wont proffer advice as it seems, first and foremost, that you just need some time to recover

Perhaps come back to the forum in a few months with more details of routes etc. and see if anyone can help get you restarted, if indeed that is what you would then like to do.

All the best

Stradageek
Cyril Haearn
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Joined: 30 Nov 2013, 11:26am

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Cyril Haearn »

Fact is, this sort of terror is common and can happen at any time, best to concede defeat and stop cycling on the road
Entertainer, juvenile, curmudgeon, PoB, 30120
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Jdsk
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Joined: 5 Mar 2019, 5:42pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Jdsk »

Cyril Haearn wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 7:23pm Fact is, this sort of terror is common and can happen at any time, best to concede defeat and stop cycling on the road
Is that your advice to Tim or to all of us, please?

Thanks

Jonathan
markjohnobrien
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Joined: 4 Oct 2007, 8:15pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by markjohnobrien »

Jdsk wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 7:33pm
Cyril Haearn wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 7:23pm Fact is, this sort of terror is common and can happen at any time, best to concede defeat and stop cycling on the road
Is that your advice to Tim or to all of us, please?

Thanks

Jonathan
I wouldn’t call it advice - that’s far too rational.
Raleigh Randonneur 708 (Magura hydraulic brakes); Blue Raleigh Randonneur 708 dynamo; Pearson Compass 631 tourer; Dawes One Down 631 dynamo winter bike;Raleigh Travelogue 708 tourer dynamo; Kona Sutra; Trek 920 disc Sram Force.
roubaixtuesday
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Joined: 18 Aug 2015, 7:05pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by roubaixtuesday »

I can't really offer any help, but would like to express sympathy and solidarity.
cycle tramp
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Joined: 5 Aug 2009, 7:22pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by cycle tramp »

Sorry to hear of the situation. I can understand your decision. You area stronger person than me. If I had been in your shoes and had caught up with them I do not think I would have acted so honorably.
Motorhead: god was never on your sidehttps://www.google.com/search?ie=UTF-8&client=m ... +your+side
cycle tramp
Posts: 3532
Joined: 5 Aug 2009, 7:22pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by cycle tramp »

Cyril Haearn wrote: 23 Apr 2021, 7:23pm Fact is, this sort of terror is common and can happen at any time, best to concede defeat and stop cycling on the road
Better to live one day as a Lion than a hundred years as a sheep. I think I will continue to cycle on the road.

(I am over 14 stone in wieght, 6 foot tall, heavily tattooed, 23 inches across the shoulders and a beard in which small mice have played. I am a hard person to terrorize).
Motorhead: god was never on your sidehttps://www.google.com/search?ie=UTF-8&client=m ... +your+side
beanboyyy
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Joined: 22 Apr 2021, 8:53am

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by beanboyyy »

Sorry about what happened to you. I had sleepless nights over accidently scaring a cyclist on the roads (not even a near accident as in none of us had to swerve or anything was just a silly decision by me to carry on overtaking a cyclist after they had signalled right) so the fact that someone could live with themselves after purposely intimidating another road user is absolutely disgusting. Unfortunately we live in a world where some people who are allowed to drive will have no conscience whatsoever. Hope the police find that idiot
Pneumant
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Joined: 7 Oct 2010, 8:25pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Pneumant »

OP; unfortunately I think you encountered a sadistic bully in his cage there, reporting him is the right thing to do. He probably does this to other road users as well. You can check the MOT history of the vehicle here; https://www.gov.uk/check-mot-status. Might be a result if he is not legal, no MOT could also mean no insurance. Proverbial book thrown. Perhaps a couple of weeks off and then a change of route. Maybe consider an electric bicycle, scooter or small motorbike instead for the commute?
Jamesh
Posts: 2963
Joined: 2 Jan 2017, 5:56pm

Re: Deliberate Close Passing /Assault and now just too scared to ride to work.

Post by Jamesh »

Sorry to here it.

There are many such idiots on the road. Don't let them win by stopping cycling.

Report him as I expect they are breaking other rules and the next victim may be a young child.

Cheers James
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