What Has Made You Laugh Today ?

[merseymouth]

Hi all, Nearly laughed myself sick in Sainsbury's this morning?
I saw the Vegan "Vecon Rashers" product, supposedly a substitute for good old streaky bacon. Yuk!
The sight of it made me think that it had passed at least twice through a dog .
In the same area I saw "Vegetarian Cumberland Sausage"? A bit like "Non Alcoholic Whisky", too painful for thought.
I think the word Oxymoron has been redefined, very sad. IGICB MM

[Cowsham]

Hi all, Nearly laughed myself sick in Sainsbury's this morning?
I saw the Vegan "Vecon Rashers" product, supposedly a substitute for good old streaky bacon. Yuk!
The sight of it made me think that it had passed at least twice through a dog .
In the same area I saw "Vegetarian Cumberland Sausage"? A bit like "Non Alcoholic Whisky", too painful for thought.
I think the word Oxymoron has been redefined, very sad. IGICB MM

Don't understand wanting to eat something that looks like the stuff your disgusted by. I'm not vegan but a wanabe veggy ( don't always get the choice if I'm out but won't make a fuss about it ). Not cos I want to save a cow ( I like leather ) more that I prefer nice fresh food not second hand food. Wouldn't eat pig though after a mate who works at the abattoir told me they regularly cut the cancers out of them.

[merseymouth]

Hello again, I am starting to worry about possible mental health issues for Vegans who develop a conscience about cruelty to Vegetables?
TTFN MM

[Cowsham]

Hello again, I am starting to worry about possible mental health issues for Vegans who develop a conscience about cruelty to Vegetables?
TTFN MM

I'm starting to worry about possible mental health issues of people who worry about possible mental health issues for Vegans who develop a conscience about cruelty to Vegetables?

[al_yrpal]

Hi I am starting to worry about the sanity and wellbeing of Merseymouth! What would this forum be like if he had a meltdown and stopped posting droll comments.

Al

[pete75]

Wouldn't eat pig though after a mate who works at the abattoir told me they regularly cut the cancers out of them.

You'd prefer them left in?

[Cowsham]

Wouldn't eat pig though after a mate who works at the abattoir told me they regularly cut the cancers out of them.

You'd prefer them left in?

Maybe -- might add to the flavor.

[merseymouth]

Hi all, Don't get too serious in this thread, irony is but one part of humour!
The sight of pretend rashers of streaky bacon created for people who prefer not to eat meat seems to me to be bl**dy daft? Other example are surely oxymorons, "Vegan Cheese", "Vegan Sausage Rolls", even "Vegan Burgers"? Why not "Vegan Patties"? yum, yum.
If you heard all of the Dietary Rules and Regs that my medical advisers insist I follow you might understand my mindset? One instance, my Stroke Specialist insists I follow an Ultra Low Fat regime, but at the same time my Cancer Specialist demands that I keep my fat consumption High?????????
Just like on this Forum I am bound to annoy one group or other! .
But I understand comments made about food production, used to visit a firm that produced gelatin for making those must have Jellies for children's party? And as for the place making Black Pudding? I'd turn you off all food with the sights I've seen . Must laugh or I'd go mad, or maybe I already am??? IGICB MM

[Cowsham]

Hi all, Don't get too serious in this thread, irony is but one part of humour!
The sight of pretend rashers of streaky bacon created for people who prefer not to eat meat seems to me to be bl**dy daft? Other example are surely oxymorons, "Vegan Cheese", "Vegan Sausage Rolls", even "Vegan Burgers"? Why not "Vegan Patties"? yum, yum.
If you heard all of the Dietary Rules and Regs that my medical advisers insist I follow you might understand my mindset? One instance, my Stroke Specialist insists I follow an Ultra Low Fat regime, but at the same time my Cancer Specialist demands that I keep my fat consumption High?????????
Just like on this Forum I am bound to annoy one group or other! .
But I understand comments made about food production, used to visit a firm that produced gelatin for making those must have Jellies for children's party? And as for the place making Black Pudding? I'd turn you off all food with the sights I've seen . Must laugh or I'd go mad, or maybe I already am??? IGICB MM

Stroke Specialist!
Cancer Specialist!
If your not a doctor -- I wish you well in your recovery. Obviously likewise if you do happen to be a doctor.

[merseymouth]

Hi Cowsham, Passed over the stomach ulcer caused by the stroke medication, the shingle were nothing but they brought on the stroke? looking for the stroke site was when they found the brain tumour, friends said how did they find that when the where looking in the wrong place, head not butt!
Then when they were checking out the ulcers I was blown up then hosed out, which of course made to take a plank fall??? Broke little finger at the base, another clinic to visit!
But despite all of that I was able to gift our daughter away at marriage , something not envisaged.
But despite everything I try to enjoy life, still wobble about on my trike, and on top of that I smile each morning when I find I've still got a pulse.
Laughing is way better than crying TTFN MM

[Cyril Haearn]

Plus One for optimism MM
Reminds me of Three Men in a Boat, J found that he had 25 illnesses to convince himself he needed a holiday
(24 actually, he could not have Housemaids Knee )

[merseymouth]

P.S.,Forgot the Kidney Stone that took surgical removal, ho hum.
I believe that I qualify for "Big Chief I-Spy's Gold Badge" for Hospital departments visited. Gynaecology was causing me a problem, but they did an ultra sound scan to find the stone the said -Well, I can tell you you're not pregnant"! Box Ticked My wife now has a full time occupation as my Appointment Secretary! TTFN MM

*P.S.S. I'm a natural pessimist so it could be trying MM

[Cowsham]

Last week my wee boy comes into the kitchen a bit anxious and announces a nuclear bomb has just went off in Iran ( his mate from school had texted him some fake news off Facebook ) -- I said that's very unlikely, trying to calm his fears but quickly Googled news and flicked on the news on tv. We soon established this was not the case.

As a family we have a big connection with music and every member plays instruments and/or sings except Goth boy Johnny ( we tried getting him guitar lessons when he was younger but he gave up pretty soon after ). Well soon after the fake bomb announcement my wife says "oh by the way Johnny wants me to arrange singing lessons for him. "

I turned to the wee boy and said " can you tell me more about this atomic bomb? "

[pwa]

There was a nice story in the local (S.Wales ) news today about a pony being rescued from a busy road in Cardiff. The pony was on the busy dual carriageway A48. The traffic stopped and some drivers got out and tried to calm the pony. Then a bus driver invited them to put the pony in the bus. He put the disabled ramp down and they led the pony in. There was an amusing photo of the bus with a contented pony inside, on its way to the Park and Ride. The pony is now back where it belongs and the bus has been cleaned.

[mattheus]

Thanks for that!

"
Luckily, South Wales Police saw the funny side and shared the story on social media along with a picture of the horse on board the bus.
In a Twitter post, they said: "A loose horse on the 'mane' A48 Eastern Ave decided it wanted to 'stirrup' a little trouble but in doing so it risked falling 'foal' of the law.
"

https://www.msn.com/en-gb/autos/news/ho ... ar-BBZ2QnQ

(if you scroll down you'll also see a horse being ridden into McDonalds … )