P17 ROY the elbow clipper - my sweet revenge

[stewartpratt]

If someone passes too close I gesture at them through their mirror with thumb and forefinger very close

I tend to use the thumb pressed against the extended forefinger and second finger*. I believe it's incredibly rude in Italian



* I'm not good on digit terminology

[chrisc]

All very fine guys, but ... just beware the disproportionate response.

[ericonabike]

If you're into roof-slapping you need to be prepared for the consequences! Only done it once, out of sheer frustration, and the driver braked to a halt in front of me, got out and threatened to beat me to a pulp if I ever touched his car again. Not being too well-versed in ju-jitsu, and not having been in a fight since I was 13, I just stared back at him in what I hoped was a neutral manner. He gave up and drove off. A friend in a similar situation was flattened by a driver, and was too scared to report it. Touching their car crosses a line - not to say you shouldn't do it, just don't do it if you're not prepared to back it up...

[Crowmark]

I think the 'touch the car' can be done in a way that puts the onus on the motorist being too close to you. Don't bang the car, just fend it off with your hand flat against the panel. If they then do the irate 'no-one touches my (rapidly depreciating metal box car' thing, you are in my humble opinion quite justified in replying "I was trying to prevent my bicycle getting scratched by your car as you'd passed far too close to me".
I can't guarantee you'll get a civil/intelligble/reasoned response but at least you didn't strike their precious baby.

[Simon E]

I think the 'touch the car' can be done in a way that puts the onus on the motorist being too close to you. Don't bang the car, just fend it off with your hand flat against the panel.

Fair point, though by doing that you may alter your own line towards the kerb. Also, a slap is noticed whereas a gentle tap may not. If they want to argue about it my response is simple - "If I can touch your car that easily YOU ARE TOO CLOSE!"

Anyone who dares to argue about me touching their car will get a diatribe about their 2-tonne car touching me due to their carelessness, and the possible consequences (including revenge/lifelong harassment by my wife).

[alanesq]

I can confirm that a palm slap never fails to really upset a motorist.

but, I have recently purchase myself a Airzound air horn and I am finding this to be my best purchase in years.
You just give them a good blast with this and not only does it surprise the hell out of them and draw attention to their actions by everyone around, but you then feel you have had your revenge so you are not left feeling angry and frustrated
I also give it a blast when any car is parked on the cycle path etc. so I feel I have annoyed them as they annoyed me and again I am left feeling calm rather than angry......

BTW - I have always thought it would be great to make a device something like an inkjet printer head which if a car passes too close it can paint a message down the side of their car as it passes

[AlanD]

BTW - I have always thought it would be great to make a device something like an inkjet printer head which if a car passes too close it can paint a message down the side of their car as it passes

It's called a bamboo cane fixed horizontally with a nail fixed in the end.

[Mark1978]

In my limited experience, there is nothing more likely (at least in Cardiff) to get a motorist angry and out of his car than slapping the bodywork with an open palm (makes decent noise, little chance of damage) or knocking the mirror back. Suddenly gets into their personal space just like they have in to yours. Maybe it is my large size and androgynous cycling attire but male drivers and passengers have felt it was ok to chase after me on two occasions now

I've often thought of that, but not done it. Just bend their nearside mirror around. Does no damage at all, but requires them to stop and put it right.

[[XAP]Bob]

In my limited experience, there is nothing more likely (at least in Cardiff) to get a motorist angry and out of his car than slapping the bodywork with an open palm (makes decent noise, little chance of damage) or knocking the mirror back. Suddenly gets into their personal space just like they have in to yours. Maybe it is my large size and androgynous cycling attire but male drivers and passengers have felt it was ok to chase after me on two occasions now

I've often thought of that, but not done it. Just bend their nearside mirror around. Does no damage at all, but requires them to stop and put it right.

Just open their boot....

[cajun]

Hi Dave

Just to let you know in West Sussex we can report bad driving by internet to West Sussex Police. I did this once when an aggressive driver tried to mow me down on a one-way street with an exit to the left or right. I was in the righthand lane ready to go round small roundabout and would you believe it he went straight on so should have been using the left hand lane! The road is clearly marked - going right - right hand lane, straight on - lefthand lane. Anyway he had to wait for me later as I rode along main road and he thought he was quicker going round the back roads but had to wait at junction for me to past, again very abusive with waving arms and gestulating!! (Me 65 year old pensioner). As said I reported bad driving (managed to memorise most of the registration number) but Police found the culprit and apparantly had words!!. This was of some comfort to me as it really shook me up. This is a drive by our Police Force to stop this kind of behaviour and I will definitely use it again, especially as I am not able to confront driver myself - just in case.

Cajun

[Gearoidmuar]

A former cycling friend of mine (we didn't fall out but he went elsewhere) was cycling with me into town to meet our other pals on a Sunday Morning when a Taxi-driver yelled abuse at us for no reason at all other than the fact that he probably was hungover. My friend tossed some abuse back. Taxi-man lost the cool entirely. My friend (we were progressing in the same direction) drifted across into the Taximan's lane and directed two good kicks of his heel at the driver's door making two big dents. "Any more abuse out of you", he said, "and I'll call the Police and you'll lose your licence"
Not a peep was heard back.

[Rob Archer]

I know someone who carries a couple of potatoes in her pannier. If she gets cut up too closely she catches up with them at the next set of lights and shoves a spud up the exhaust pipe. Never fails apparently!