Mechanical mishaps especially welcome.....
*ahem*
Before I start, I should point out that I made the switch from flat pedals to SPD-SL and completed a handful of rides without incident. So some of you can probably already sense where this is going. We had to have one of our pets put down the previous day so I'm not in the best frame of mind anyway.
"What's it like out?" I asked the missus.
"It's fine, you won't need arm warmers," she says.
I stuff them in my jersey pocket anyway, unconvinced. Less than a quarter of a mile down the road, I quickly realise it's bloody freezing, and stop to put the arm warmers on. Check the road's clear, make a complete buttock* of clipping in, end up sprawled in the road, drive-side down.
Pick myself up, nobody saw me, no problem. This has never happened to me before. I'm a REAL boy now! The rear mech is scratched up a bit, but the hangar looks fine, gears seem to be working.
So I get about 15 miles into this 32-miler with about 2000ft of ascent. My wrist hurts, my elbow hurts, my buttock* hurts. I'm not enjoying this one little bit and it isn't going well, so I stop on a climb (sensibly!) since I'm just not "feeling it" today. Gather my thoughts, attempt to set off, not enough momentum, hello Mr Floor, again!
Swearing happened. Again everything looks OK considering I've now dropped it on the drive-side twice in the same ride, but unknown to me, all is not so good in RearMechLand.
The last climb of the day, about a 3% gradient, but stick a fork in me, I'm done. I drop into a granny gear and the rear mech overshoots the cassette and would have been into the spokes had I not been too lazy to take the dork disc off. The chain breaks - how, I do not know, but it's not on the bike any more. When I find it, the masterlink is missing. A tantrum ensues. I pick the chain up and launch it into a low orbit. It probably hasn't landed yet.
Phoned the missus to come get me. First time I have ever been defeated by a ride. It's only lucky for the bike that there wasn't a pond nearby.
Once home it turns out that the mech hanger is bent in by about 3mm, though I managed to straighten it out (but bought a replacement anyway). Also, the rear mech is a write-off. Luckily it's only about £22 worth of Shimano Acera 8sp.
Replaced the hanger and mech, but to top it all off I cut the chain two links too long, then couldn't get the masterlink back off to shorten it. Managed to pinch my hands (both of them, which is impressive) in the not-the-tool-for-the-job pliers I was using - pliers which got launched down the garden in a paddy as I invented myself some new swear words.
Considering taking up something a bit safer. Maybe base-jumping.
[edit] "buttock" was not my word of choice.
